Sunday, September 11, 2005

Close-Reading Porn: Part 1

Rock snob and I recently sat down to discuss some of the more pressing issues in today’s world; and first on our docket was the state of the triple-X entertainment industry. In case it had somehow managed to slip past your keen observation skills, I am, in fact, a homosexual. And like many young men who are single and currently “not getting any” I occasionally indulge in a little something we in the know call “porn-oh”. As shocking as news like this might be, I ask that you stay with me.

Rock snob and I noted that in both ghey and straight porn there seems to be heavy emphasis on hairless, orange-tanned, bottle-blondes who are freakishly fit [but we’ll save that debate for another day]. We also couldn’t help but notice a similarity between the storylines in gay porn and in lesbian scenes for straight men. Inevitably two “straight” co-eds somehow manage to wind up naked in a change-room and one thing leads to another and they are engaging in their very first gay sex!

That “thing” that “leads to the other” is somewhat of a mystery to the both of us as it would seem that gay sex would probably only occur between two people if they were in fact, you know, GAY. I mean, I can’t count how many times a female plumber showed up at my door, fixed the pipes under my sink and then offered to fix my pipe. And I almost always refuse for the simple fact that I hanker for the wang and not the tang.

You would not believe how many websites meant for gay men use the angle of young straight guys having sex with other men for cash and cash alone [note: I only know this in the name of research]. It seems kind of odd to me that there should be such a high prioritization of straight men; as if to suggest that the idea of two gay men who might actually be engaging in sex for the enjoyment of it rather than cash is somehow less desirable then someone doing it for money. Why? If someone is in the mood to watch two guys hump on film I sincerely doubt they’d change the channel simply because the people on screen happen to be actual homosexuals rather than pretend ones.

Which brings me to my next point: is there even such a thing as gay-for-pay? It would seem that a man making a living off of having sex with other men – regardless of who he sleeps with in his personal life – is a little left of straight. I suppose I could have sex with a woman if I had to – or wanted to – and it wouldn’t change the fact that I’m primarily attracted to men. But the thing is I sincerely doubt that as a gay man I’d actively seek a career where having sex with a woman is part of the job description.

Of course I’ve heard that gay porn pays more than straight porn because the looks of the man in straight porn are less important [straight men wouldn’t want to sexualize another man even for an instant]. But at the end of the ghey maybe it comes down to how much you want to make money? Forgive me if I think it comes down to greed. Thoughts?

I’m so glad my training in literature has been put to good use this summer.

7 Comments:

Blogger n.v. said...

I watched an episode of Real Sex where a gay-for-pay porn star is performing for the camera as his wife stands by watching. They wax humourlessly about how he isn't gay and it's only a money issue -- but I can't help but believe that they are both lying to themselves. A man who lets a man fuck him, dollar or no dollar exhanging hands, is not a straight man. A straight man couldn't turn his brain off that way for just money.

3:45 PM  
Blogger n.v. said...

I agree with you on the left of the straight point. Gay-for-pay performers are gay, repressed. It's just an outlet for them to indulge their natural tendencies without what they may perceive as real or official judgement. And they do like it. Speaking as a straight woman who loves the wang, I know that I couldn't eat pussy for money, but only if I enjoyed it on some level.

3:49 PM  
Blogger She Devil In High Heels said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you must remember... porn stars are still actors. and what do actors do? they play a role, and to these straight men in these gay porn-oh's, playing a gay man is a role and taking it up the butt goes with the role.

and maybe the reason why it's always, 'straight' men who have 'first time sex' is because men have a thing for virgins. okay, not ALL men, but a lot of creepy ones do. [most] men are perverts and taking someone's virginity is the most perverted thing ever. OOOHHHH TIGHT HOLES. *shudder*

ashley's friend...
-nicole-

8:02 PM  
Blogger SmutCutter said...

Yes.. it is called gay-for-pay - it does exist.

2:48 AM  
Blogger sixshooter said...

Plus, the "str8 boys turn ghey for cash" thing is big because it gives everyone ghey guy out there the thought that maybe, just maybe, this time, the str8 hot neighbor will switch teams.

If they'll do it for cash, they'll do it for beers ... and if they'll do it for beers, I'm gonna run right out and pick up a 6-pack ... or four.

7:33 AM  
Blogger Michael said...

I think a man who says he's gay for pay can be straight, but not undamaged.
I'm totally gay, but I've been in, out and around all the girly parts and it's not so bad. Eating pussy is comparable to ironing. Sometimes your mind wanders during, and you would certainly never start it without knowing how long til you can stop, but you finish with a sense of accomplishment, if not satisfaction.

11:19 PM  

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