Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Confessions on a Ghetto Dance Floor

Madonna, "Hung Up" video

Percentage of white people in the video: 0.5%
Percentage of white people represented by Madonna: 50%
Number of ghettos in video: 1
Percentage of people in video who look like they may have shot 50 Cent: 45%
Number of ghetto girls doing that "freak" dance: 2
Number of people humped by Madonna in video: 4
Number of people humped by Madonna in general: Undefined
Number of stereos humped by Madonna in video: 1
Percentage of pink leotard in video: 85%
Percentage of male on male action: 0%

I am definately a fan of the "Hung Up" video. Mainly because Madonna pretty much represents the 0.5% of white people in the video. I'm sorry, there's no way that I believe that these people dancing around in the ghetto are listening to Madonna let alone, "Hung Up" by Madonna. I love the song, and I definately love watching black people in the ghetto dance to what might possibly be one of the gayest songs in history. I definately expected more male on male action. But noooo, Madonna has to be all "street". Even though she probably has enough money to buy the street and build a giant gay bar on it. And I bet she would. We can only hope.

And I definately love watching Madonna hump a stereo. Because a video with Madonna humping an inanimate object is... well, a Madonna video, but that's what makes it great.


Blogger Gwen said...

Word - as if they're gonna play that song anywhere outside gay bars this year.

I love that Madonna totally brought back all the grossness of the seventies with her leotard and dance stylings, and didn't give a shit about it. My bf and I laughed at the Asian Gang Dance.

I hope the whole album is dance-y, instead of mixed up like the last one.

1:37 PM  
Blogger Ian-Ivy du Bois said...

i liked the album even though is not as DANCE as she primised it d be. but the video...
too many blacks on it, i´m not being racist, but as J´lo did it since her J´lo album, what the hell are these two trying to prove?.
I had enough with her rap during AMERICAN LIFE song... ewwwwwwww

1:26 PM  
Blogger "the" Mrs. Astor said...

Black people dancing in the streets; they are such a happy group.

3:28 PM  
Blogger Ed Grow said...

Madonna being passed around by a bunch of skeezy colored folks. And I thought she re-invented herself.

1:09 AM  
Blogger zipper said...

This was an awesome post: funny, smart and just against-the-grain enough to spark debate.

My father always said Madonna surrounded herself with black and latino back-up dancers / singers / whatever to make herself appear whiter…when I was younger, I thought thist was a strange comment, but now…

1:02 PM  
Blogger suz said...

you have to love madonna. i mean, she's almost 50, looks hotter than a 20yr old model, and is actually fit instead of just thin and waify.

any-who: just wanted to pop in and wish fleshy and rock snob a merry christmas from australia.

4:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

*scratches head* I think I will slowly back away from you people.

9:45 PM  

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