Friday, October 28, 2005

Mean Queens Presents A Photo Essay: Courtney Love with People with More Class than Herself

Here we see Courtney and Paris at the weekly "Mega-Skanks" meeting awaiting Britney, Xtina and Heidi Fleiss. What I love most about this picture is the woman in the background who looks like she's afraid she might catch something by sitting to close to them.

Chelsea Clinton: "Who?"
Courtney Love: "Who?"

Upon discovering who Courtney was, Chelsea promptly called the secret service and had her removed from the party. And we all know how that will end: She refuses, she gets arrested, she skips her court date, repeat.

I love Courtney's smug look in this picture. And Celine's look of horror. Although I can't say much more about it. You see, I can't see it very well because I'M BLINDED BY COURTNEY'S LIPS.

Billy Joel looks more hosed than Courtney does in this picture. And is it just me, or does he look somewhat like a muppet? It says something when Courtney looks like the normal one in the picture. She's all, "Get the piano man's hands off me before I kill him and make it look like a suicide!"

(I kid. Courtney quite obviously didn't kill Kurt. I mean, if you were married to her, wouldn't you kill youself, too?)

Courtney: "So, you're not really with the police, right? Like, the cops? Phew! 'Cuz I am so stoned!"

And thus answers the question of how Richard Branson got syphilis.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005


Yesterday I ran into one of the various girlfriends I’ve established in my English classes and the following conversation transpired:

Me: Ohmygosh! You’ll never guess who’s in my Mod Lit class!
Girlfriend: Who?
Me: Do you remember that guy from our Victorian Lit class? He kind of dressed punky?
Girlfriend: The one who dressed too pretty to be actually punk?
Me: Yeah! He’s super cute eh, and TOTALLY a gay.
Girlfriend: Yeah, but he’s bitchy and mean.
Me: Oh I know.
Girlfriend: You do realize bitchy and mean is your “type” right?
Me: That explains a lot.
Girlfriend: You need to find a guy who’s bitchy and mean enough to keep you interested so that you don’t realize he’s actually nice.
Me: Know any?

I always admonish women who claim to go for the “bad boy” type because I think it’s ridiculous and weird. But the more I think about it, I’m beginning to wonder if maybe the ghey equivalent is going for guys that are bitchy and mean. Because I sure have had my fair share of crushes on men who have the personality of an axe-wound. I’m not sure what it is; perhaps it’s the thrill of the hunt or something that harks back to my animalistic-instincts. Or maybe I’m just a sucker for punishment.

You’d never guess it by some of my postings, but in real-life I’m actually a fairly nice, agreeable person, so maybe I’m just not attracted to like-minded people. Maybe it is a cut-and-dry example of opposites attracting… Although I guess that doesn’t explain the penis-on-penis action I’m interested in.

Sunday, October 02, 2005

Teknikal Difikultees

ATTN: Readers using IE who see giant fonts on Mean Queens

It shows up super ass giant in my IE, too.

Furthermore, I don't know how to fix it.

So, um, yeah... Solution: Get Firefox.